Wednesday, October 26, 2011

It's a....


We had our 20 week ultrasound yesterday morning (SERIOUSLY, how in the WORLD am I already 20 weeks along?) and everything looks perfect. We actually got a pretty long ultrasound because Dr. C (the high-risk doctor that my midwives practice under) was out of town, so they didn't have very many patients. It was awesome. With Keevia we never even saw her move during the ultrasound, the technician went so quickly, but with this sweet little bundle we got to see her stretching, kicking, and even YAWN at one point. It was spectacular. And we got a pretty good "money shot" to prove that there wasn't anything but three lines in-between those legs!

We have a name picked out, but I think I'll leave y'all in suspense a little longer.

We couldn't be happier. I think Carl was a little bit disappointed, but he warmed to the idea.

Now I have a reason for the 70 gallon tote of clothes I have for each different size of baby girl clothing. I saved EVERYTHING from Keevs (well, not really everything, I've given quite a bit of clothing away to friends who have had little girls...). We did buy a new "coming home" outfit yesterday for this one though!

I'm so excited to have two girls so close in age. I always wanted a sister (and got one my sophomore year of high school, Hi Hebbie!), so I'm so thankful we're able to give Keevia that gift.

Now I just have to get over the fact that my toddler will be TWO on Saturday.

Tuesday, October 18, 2011

Patience is such a virtue...

And it's not one that I've had much of recently.

I read my friend Stacey's blog post last week about patience, and it's had me thinking ever since. Some days I feel like a great mother. I have endless patience, the whines don't get on my nerves, I'm understanding when she has temper tantrums...

Today hasn't been one of those days. I suffer from fibromyalgia, on top of being pregnant. Whenever the weather is changing (a storm coming, a cold front coming... anything that messes with the barometric pressure), I usually feel pretty crummy. As I type this, the thunder is rolling in, although this storm has been creeping up on us all day. I have felt HORRIBLE today. Nothing in particular, but just general blah. I have no energy, had a constant headache, and just irritable. To top it all off, I'm sleep deprived. Keevia hasn't been sleeping well this week, and has even had 2-3 night terrors. She's also been waking up in the middle of the night and coming to bed with us, but being very, very restless.

So, in short, I didn't have a good Mommy day. Keevia was whiny and clingy, but strangely enough she was clingy to my Mom, not me. I lost my temper with her more than once, and spoke in a tone I don't like speaking in.

I do my best not to beat myself up for it. No mother is perfect, no matter how perfectly they may come across. Instead of dwelling on the bad days, I try to take it one day at a time and make tomorrow better.

This sweet face keeps me going, and makes me want to be a better Mommy.
How do you deal with the bad Mommy days?

Thursday, October 13, 2011

I'm totally going to jinx myself... (sleep post!)

About two weeks ago we moved a twin mattress into Keevia's room and put it on the floor. That night she climbed up on it, laid down, said night night and closed her eyes. I asked her if she wanted me to lay down with her and she said no. She went to sleep that night by herself in her dark room. And the next day for naptime. And the next night. And the night after that. No tears.

I was in SHOCK. This is the child I have to snuggle to sleep, that usually takes from 20 minutes to over an hour. We put the twin bed in so I could lay down with her and then get up when she fell asleep (usually goes faster than me rocking her in the living room).

The 4th night we went to my husbands parents and spent the night. I laid down with Keevs and got her to sleep in the room we sleep in. She went down easy, but slept really poorly that night.

The next night we were back home, and when I suggested she go to bed, she started screaming. I ended up rocking her to sleep that night and several nights after. A few times she fell asleep sitting up in my lap. Then I started laying back down with her.

I don't know if she was scared of her bed, or her room, or whatever, but even with me laying down with her she would scream. Now, as I'm sure you all know that I am VERY against cry-it-out when it comes to baby (BABY as in 2-6 month old baby) being in a room by themselves, in the dark, "teaching" themselves to soothe to sleep. I've never been against in-arms crying however, and we've done it numerous times over the past two years. Laying down with her, with her sobbing, is the same to me as me holding her and her crying. So for about two to three nights, I laid down and had her cry for 5-10 minutes until she gave up and decided Mommy meant business and it was bedtime. She'd then drift off to sleep. The 4th night there was no crying.

Night 5 I tucked her in, and then sat at her feet. Crying started again, I soothed her, talked to her, sang to her, and 15ish minutes later she FINALLY calmed down, then fell asleep a few minutes later. Night 6 she cried for about 5 or so minutes, then went on down. Night before last she cried for a minute or two, wanting me to lay down with her. I kept telling her I was sitting at her feet and wouldn't move til she fell asleep. She went down pretty easy. Last night I told her it was bedtime and she set off for her bedroom. I went to fill up her sippy and she popped her head out of bedroom door and said "C'mon Mommy!" I told her to go climb up in bed and I'd be right there. When I went in, she was snuggled on her pillow. No tears. I stayed in there 5-10 minutes, then I told her night-night and went in the living room. She drifted off on her own.

I plan on keeping it up... we're doing so well right now, and I'm so happy about it. I honestly won't do anything different with number two. The only reason I made a push for getting her to go to sleep on her own is that my back cannot take packing her 28lb dead weight, especially with a burgeoning belly. I didn't figure we'd be going to sleep on our own quite yet, but I'm pleased with it!

Now to just tackle potty-learning!

Tuesday, October 11, 2011

I'm so opposite... (alternatively titled: Getting Healthy!)

I'm really, really bad at naming posts.

By this point in my pregnancy (18 weeks today!), according to my Baby Bump app, I should have gained 12-15 lbs.

::blank stare::

Oh! You obviously mean I should have LOST 12-15 lbs. Right, pregnancy app?

Yeah... I'm not doing so great with that whole gaining weight thing.  Thankfully my midwives aren't concerned. They did establish that my morning sickness isn't so bad that I'm not eating, which its not, then they seemed unconcerned with the fact that my weight keeps creeping down. I'm actually, as of this morning, at my lowest weight since BEFORE I delivered Keevia. I weighed in this morning at 233. I started this pregnancy at 249ish.

Maybe there is something to that whole HCG hormone thing working for weight loss. I know I can't eat the portion sizes that I could before. I can't eat fried food this pregnancy without REALLY regretting it. I'm actually struggling to get my protein, because just like last time, I really have a problem with textures. I can't eat peanut butter or chicken without gagging.

I stated on here before that my Daddy was undergoing some medical tests. They thought that he possibly had Multiple Scelrosis, so he and my Mom went on a modified Hallelujah Diet.This means that they cut out all red meat and pork, most bread and grains, and started eating MUCH more salad and veggies. I eat several times a day at their house when Carl isn't home (and the fact that apparently when I'm pregnant, I can't cook until 20+ weeks), so I started eating this way a LOT.

Also, I've discovered that I have a wheat intolerance. Not a gluten intolerance, but I just can't tolerate wheat. It causes me to be queasy, so I drink more pop (which I don't want to do), and it causes constipation, and a general feeling of ickiness (yes, I made that word up). It's HARD, I'm not going to lie. I've always sworn that I was adopted from a Italian family because I LOVE PASTA. Seriously, it's one of my absolute favorite foods in the whole wide world. And Gluten-Free pasta sucks. That's all there is to it. It's also hard to just grab something fast, because I can't just eat a sandwich. And no cookies, or cake, or anything. For some reason I've convinced myself that chocolate has wheat in it and I always think I can't have it either until I go "oh, duh." and then go on a binge....

But, I've lost several inches of bloat off my waist, as well as feel MUCH better. The nausea which was still plauging me is SO MUCH better that it's almost worth not eating bread and pasta. Almost.

So that's where I am. Eating healthy and losing weight. Who'd have thought? The baby is obviously growing and thriving (although I still can't feel my fundus). We go in two weeks to find out if its a boy or a girl!

Sunday, October 9, 2011

Happy Birthday Momma

Today is my Mommy's birthday. I'll be nice and not tell you which birthday it is, although she doesn't seem to mind that thing so much... but still, I'll let her keep her secrets.

I have such a special relationship with my Mom. We've always been close, but throughout college we managed to get even closer. She's my best friend and my confidant and I have no idea what I would do without her. Just today, when Keevia fell and bumped her mouth, which started bleeding profusely, she took over and examined her. When I felt like my little world was falling apart, she took over and took control.... just like always. And I'm so thankful for that. She's been my rock for so many years.

We don't do big birthday celebrations around these parts, and due to my Dad's special new diet (oh, hey, he's doing MUCH better and the scare of MS (which is what we were really afraid of) is very, VERY low.) and Mom's diabetes,  if I were to bake a cake, it would probably go uneaten. Mom is also the worlds MOST DIFFICULT PERSON TO BUY FOR. So I'm not even attempting.

But Momma, I love you. I'm so happy you're my mom. Thank you for everything you do for us, from changing Keevia's diapers, to driving me to my prenatal appointments, to cooking us dinner when I can't do it without throwing up. Know that we're here for you as much as we possibly can be, and we would do anything for you. I love you Mommy.

Happy Birthday.

Saturday, October 8, 2011

I love baby kicks.

Seriously. I can't get enough of them.

As of right now I'm 17 weeks and 4 days pregnant. No, I didn't actually know that off the top of my head, I had to look it up (Thank you apps and pregnancy tickers!). This baby seems to be following in his or her older sisters footsteps. I felt Keevs move for the first time at 15w6d and felt this one right around the same time (I think). I KNOW I felt this one move last Saturday morning, it wasn't just the little butterfly tickles you sit on the couch  holding your breath, trying to decipher if it was baby or gas, but a big resounding HEY MOM kind of kick. I've even felt this kid from the OUTSIDE already. It's amazing.

But I really do love baby kicks. It's my favorite part of pregnancy. I love having that connection with the little baby, the baby that nobody knows but me, the little kicks and punches and rolls and tumbles. I just love the feeling.

I can't wait to find out more about this baby, whether it's a girl or a boy, to learn his or her personality more, to breastfeed them, to snuggle them with all the lights out, lying in bed, wearing him or her around the house. I can't wait.

On a totally unrelated note, have y'all seen the new Boba carriers? The Boba 3g? They are AWESOME looking, and to me the best part is that you can't wear a newborn in them (the regular Boba 2g is for 15lbs+). And, unlike the 2g, they have a looooot of gorgeous prints (although I did lust after the Tweet print quite a bit). I've blogged about the wonders of Heavenly Hold before, but now they have an awesome giveaway for a Boba 3G! Just check out their contest page to find out how!